
Random First Lines: you spread your lies to make her cryyou say what you dont mean whyyou make up all these liesinside we're its me... : Other » Read
A mid-age love. Love does not happen in childhood, in teens or in twenties alone. Cupid can strike in 40s. This is the story of a single and successful woman, who found love unexpectedly. And discovered age was no bar to love for the older - the better and maturer. Old-fashioned love, where hearts are exchanged, feelings r mutual and caring is obvious. THIS IS A FIVE-PART BOOK. View table of contents...
Submitted: Jun 20, 2008 Reads: 577 Comments: 63 Likes: 34
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What can I say that hasn't already been mentioned? I'm registered on a number of sites, and usually I see the same thing time after time - lots of overt sexual references, too much foul language and not enough plot-building.
You, on the other hand, hold the reader's interest in the palm of your hand. This is a fine start to a story which could go any which way you please. Saw 'What Lies Beneath' the other night, and your start reminds me of the first part of the film when the tension is carefully built up to a crescendo.
I don't have a clue where you are going with this, and that's what makes the story worth following. I didn't know you wrote prose, although your poetry's good too.
Phil
Posted: Jun 20, 2008
loads of suspense so far...waiting patiently for the two to meet. A good intro. Love it
Posted: Jun 20, 2008
I love it you are right there are no bounders for love even age can’t wait for more of your wonderful books.
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
I liked it! Keep it up, since I like romance. I hope there's more...
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
It seems really good to me, keep up the amazingly well articulated work.
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
Great detail and background; its rly good, cant wait to read more :)
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
A lovely start to a good book. I can see my self curled up in a blanket sitting near a window, with a cup of hot chocolate reading this. I like it and can't wait for the next installment!
Hugs and Hearts~
Justine
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
I did not want to stop reading. I was swept away and I for a moment forgot about the humming of my radiator that has been annoying me all evening. I want more, but I pray that your next chapter is not predictable. No man in shining armour, something real and grounded.
Well Done!! Loved It!!
Cheers, Kezacoop x
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
I love this story so far. I have to agree with everyone else, you show such detail, background and emotions with this story. It is really great, I can't wait to find out what happens next. Excellent job my friend. :)
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
that's really a good beginning........and it's quite true.........love can happen -with anyone,anywhere,of any age,at any time!!
really looking forward to more of it!!
And i would be glad if you could go through some of my previous work.......i haven't put up anything new lately because i was involved with admission for college and all........
anyways great job !! ^-^
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
i enjoyed readin this i can't wait to read more
it's very good
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
This is a great story, many romantic stories always use language or involve only the sex, I just know that, and what you have here is an original masterpiece. I have never seen a romantic book, or one that I heard of, having a Canadian, independent, and down-to-Earth woman. I enjoy this story so much, and that's just the first chapter!...I think. Well anyways, I hope you do more, this is getting REALLY good!
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
Great story. I agree with KamiKaze, every romance stories I've heard or seen only involved language, but this is original in its own right. Update me.
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
I liked it, but I'm not a big one for a lot a detail. I still like it though! Can't wait for part 2!
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
I love it! Keep it up, your writing style is amazing! =)
~Maple Bowen
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
got me interested. look forward to the next chapter. be sure and let me know when its up. snow
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
Very nice, Bubbly! You've captured my attention and I can't wait to see what happens next! Thanks for bringing this to my attention, I enjoyed reading it. Be sure to let me know when you post the next part!
Stephanee :)
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
wow!! I loved it. it was great. good job. Make a nother one!
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
I loved this Bubbly....first chapter is great....and i want to read all of them....
please do keep me informed,....i liked the concept too....and Calgary sounds real cold......
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
how come novels have chapters and books don't? it doesn't makes sense at all, aren't they the sane thing?
Anyway, great book and a wonderful story line!!
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
Hello,
o.k Bubbly ur first chapter was interesting and it aroused the readers curiosity. But you have to work on the editing of this piece,there are countless grammatical errors in this piece, i counted no less than six in the first two paragraphs alone. You really need to work on these. they take too much away from your story, plus the story becomes a lot less gripping when you constantly look at grammatical errors.
I hope you don't mind this but take a look at the excerpt of the first chapter i put up from my romantic novel. Alice, Urja and everyone else pointed out many editing mistakes which i am working on. Alice actually wrote a 900 word plus comment. So take this as a challenge.
I wish my typing was faster and i could point out each and every mistake but its taken me ten minutes writing even this much LOL.
The pace of the story is good, but you have to get a little bit more descriptive regarding ur main character. Bring out her emotions and thoughts with reflective dialogues. When describing surroundings make sure you describe all aspects of it, sight, smell and looks. Try to start each sentence with a different word than the preceding one, this makes your narrative more free flowing. I will be back later to give you more pointers if you want. Sorry if i have offended you, that is not my intention. I think of you as a friend and honesty is the most important thing in friendship.
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
It's good so far, very descriptive, I can feel it's leading on to something big. :D Great job =]
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
Well I'm not one for reading romance books, so I really don't know what to say.
~DarkFairy~
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
Thank you for inviting me to read you latest work. I enjoyed it very much. I like you main character and want to learn more about her. You a talented writer. I hope you make big money on your writing some day if not all ready.
More please. You have me hooked.
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
it's good :D
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
oh la laaa
I like it
:]
can't wait for more
:]
(you got double smilies)
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
Bubbly, This is good Work and its wonderfully written. So far I read your opening and it seems quite interesting. I will defiantly be following to the end. Please keep me posted when you add chapters. Oh and I love the title.
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
I'm not into romance, romance novels that is, but this kept my interest. It moved along well and I wanted to read more. Great start. Sometimes I had to re-read a sentence or two,(maybe punctuation?) but maybe that's me. Good Job. Can't wait to find out what's next. Ted
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
I love Calgary!!!!!!!!!!!! I love it, love it love it love it.. Yes it's cold but I love it!!!!! I miss it too.
Great plot line. It's interesting.
~Kaori
Posted: Jun 21, 2008
i have the urge to read this over and over until the next part comes in...... ^_^ nice..
Posted: Jun 22, 2008
I can recollect the times when I was younger. Saying that I am eighteen but what I truly intend to say is I remember my parents telling me not to worry and enjoy this life as a child while I could. I loved childhood so easy and fun. Did I live it to the fullest and enjoy it enough that is still a question that boggles my brain. I wouldn't take anything back. I guess that just focuses on one part but I can most definitely connect with getting into a zone when doing something creative and the world passes by while you are stopped in time. Nice little piece of reading bubbly I loved it.
Posted: Jun 22, 2008
Wow, this is lovely :)
Posted: Jun 22, 2008
This is a very interesting beginning you have here! Reading the beginning about her writing her novel as more of a self-memoir within a fictional story makes me wonder how much of this story is you, LOL. I think we can all identify with having to write in our spare time and having worlds within worlds in our head. I also like how much we learn about her just by her going through her morning routine. Please let me know about the new chapters! ~Em
Posted: Jun 22, 2008
bubbly your work is amazing I want to see you achieve a novel. While my favorite is fantasy your achievements are also great. You are terrific at describing the life of a writer. The concentration needed and the waste of how easily it is broken. I likke this idea. Can't wait to see more. Message me for updates on new works. I really wish u'd check me out o. I need to nkow how to get better. I need that concentration. Lol. talk at ya later.
Posted: Jun 22, 2008
I love it. You're a very good writer. Great job!
Posted: Jun 22, 2008
Hi bubbly,
Well I already have my prince charming, and have yet to read a romance novel. But I'm sure someday I will.
~DarkFairy~
Posted: Jun 22, 2008
hm, a few punctuation errors and maybe this chapter could've been lengthened a bit.
but other than that I thought this was written fairly well:]
Posted: Jun 22, 2008
B,
Love knows no age it only knows the heart! this is lovely, I love how the distraction sent the story into a distraction of thoughts through the mc. I cannot wait to read more tis' very interesting.
Posted: Jun 23, 2008
heya bubbly. Thanks for the good read. I always enjoy a nice romance novel. Age is but a number wen it comes to finding love. My aunt got married when she was 51 and I've never in my life seen two people more inlove....
Let me know when you've published the next chapter okay?
Posted: Jun 23, 2008
heya bubbly. Thanks for the good read. I always enjoy a nice romance novel. Age is but a number wen it comes to finding love. My aunt got married when she was 51 and I've never in my life seen two people more inlove....
Let me know when you've published the next chapter okay?
Posted: Jun 23, 2008
Wow!
THis story was discriptive yet outspoken and very lifelike,
I could just picture sohpia head bent over book
I just wish you could have put better detail of Sophia in the book....
example:
Sophia trotted down the stairs,blond hair flowing behind her. Her hair short cropped hair dancing around her tanned face.
I think you should add more detail of the character
other then that it was excellent
panda11
Posted: Jun 23, 2008
Okay..I know I'm like really late on this but this was AMAZING! I got sucked in from the very first sentence. I can almost smell the romance to come soon (I hope)!
Continue to write this story and PLEASE update me when you have a new chapter because I want to continue.
It's like I'm reading a book but I can't turn the page. I'm so eager to turn the page! Please write more
-IcyDibs402
Posted: Jun 23, 2008
i like it a lot Bubbly
i think you should give her hair and eye color in the next part too
Posted: Jun 23, 2008
Wow....Um wow. lol
This is so well written I feel like I was there. I like your idea of writing about adults who fall in love. It seems like all we read about these days is seventeen year olds who can't get a date to prom or who can't seem to get over their ex.
I can't wait for more!
Two really big thumbs up! =)
Posted: Jun 23, 2008
that`ss great
keep it up bubbly =]
Posted: Jun 23, 2008
It was good, cant wait til u update
Posted: Jun 24, 2008
Wow, you are an artist my new friend. I can't wait to read more. Keep it up.
Posted: Jun 24, 2008
This is off to a great start..I like it a lot. You definitely have a very real talent. :)
Posted: Jun 24, 2008
Hi there again Bubbly,
What I love about fiction is that we can create a whole world and yet wrap it in reality. There is so much of what writer's have to say that is close to our own emotions. Indeed Sophia would be bringing her own story into her novel and yet it gives us a glimpse into her own story. And your perhaps?
Judging from your other writing there is no doubt that you will provifde something with a little twist, quite unexpected perhaps?
Keep going, I'm intrigued and want to know what happens next.
Happy Days
Posted: Jun 25, 2008
you're a romantic person, aren't ya???
i love it!! you had me hooked with the fact that Sophia loved her career more than starting a relationship. it's like having a family is a burden to her. somehow i can relate to her situation. being in love with life but missing so much thing especially LOVE...lol!!!
Posted: Jun 27, 2008
Wow, this is good. I'm almost the same way, when im distracted i have a hard time gettin back into the mood of writing. This is a good one, awesome job! =D
Posted: Jun 27, 2008
Good start. I can't add anything more than to say I'll follow you to the next chapter! :)
Posted: Jun 28, 2008
Wow...great job! Sorry for being so late to comment! I've been super busy. To be honest with you...I am very impatient to read stories b/c they're so long...poems are more my type but once I started reading this I loved it! The background was beautiful...I can't wait to hear what happens next! Warm regards...Zia
Posted: Jun 28, 2008
Hi Bubbly this is awesome. I like her independance. Please let me know when you have updated.
Posted: Jul 8, 2008
wow thats the first story thats intresting to me lol
Posted: Jul 13, 2008
I really did tasted the beauty of the words and the smoothness of the expressions and above your chapter, i wish it is, made me long for the next phase.
I found it very interesting. please go on and don't make us wait for more time.
Good luck
Posted: Jul 28, 2008
Amazing, rich in detail. Worth the read.
Posted: Aug 10, 2008
A good start..will you be adding more chapters?
Posted: Aug 24, 2008
hey wow i really liked it..im kind of upset tho because im so new at writing and your so good at it!
ive never really tried to write much but i do hope you can help me become better if you could just commment on my vampire story...
i titled it "i dunno yet" (yes a dreadful title i know)
i dont think im author material cuz im and artist and a photographer i cant figure poeple out and definatley cant describe things but i want your opinion.pleeeeeeeeeez!!
thanks!
Posted: Sep 10, 2008
Hello Bubbly,
Your story just blew me away!! I can really relate to all the gadgets that you stated in your story. How most of them have come and gone through our lifetime and soon so will everything else that is shiny, bright, and new.
Your description of Calgary was amazing and really makes me miss it. Actually, I live only 3 1/2 hours away and drive my uncle there 2 or 3 times a month to see his family as I have an aunt and cousin attending Art School there.
This is just a feeling that I got from reading your story. Please excuse me for asking! Forgive me and correct me if I am wrong but, is this story somewhat based upon you?
Love does seem much sweeter and get better as we age! Like a bottle of fine wine!
Posted: Nov 3, 2008
i love the way u put ur writting together.But...what do u know about LOVE, MARRIAGE AND SEX.
Posted: Nov 17, 2008
this is great1 (u create a more human aspect to the story than usual romances0
:)
Posted: Nov 19, 2008
I'm assuming there's a part 2. Off to look. :)
Posted: Dec 23, 2008
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Other writing by bubbly LIMERICK Glad Eyed Girl MOLE - All About Your Future & Personality My Weekly Top 10 (34): (aug 17 - 23, 2008) If I were a free bird... 2008 - TOP 100 HOTTEST WRITERS More..
Love, Poetry, Death, Life, Poem, Romance, Pain, Fantasy, Sad, Hope, Sex, Horror, Hate, God, War, Hurt, Sadness, Loss, Dark, Humor, Fiction, Depression, Heart, Family, Friendship.